What it's like . . . part 1

It's like finding your birth parents. Only you didn't know you were looking for them.

That's how I often feel about the past 9 - 12 months I have spent in the Orthodox church. Like I've discovered this whole . . . heritage, I guess is the word, that I never knew was there. All of a sudden I have 2000 years of family history and to be honest, I feel a little cheated that I didn't know about this sooner.

I am pretty much your typical Heinz 57 type American. A little of this, a little of that. Mostly Anglo with a little German and American Indian mixed in. The thing is, I know precious little of my family history. My paternal grandmother immigrated at the age of 2 (I think) from Germany. For much of the first half of the last century, being German was not something you particularly wanted to call attention to. The family stopped speaking the language or practicing any traditions, and today I don't know that my grandmother could string together a simple sentence. On the other side, my mom's mom was raised in Kellyville, OK by her Indian father and older sister. Her mother had died when she was 2 years old. We were always told that great Granpa Doty was full-blood Cherokee, but that has been called into question over recent years. Regardless, there was some Indian blood, they were poor, and things just weren't good in Oklahoma. (I still have my Grandmother's class ring that was the last thing purchased before the banks closed during the Great Depression.) It was another heritage that seemed to be viewed as shameful and one we know so very little of. Oddly enough, I know even less about the background and families of either of my grandfather's and they are the ones with all the Irish and English in them. Go figure. Both are/were wonderful men, but I know nothing of the world or ancestry that shaped them. No photos. No letters. No oral history. Nada.

My spiritual life seems to be very similar. I have spent the vast majority of my life in "non denominational" churches. Most of them were able to trace their roots all the way back, ohhhh . . . . . . 10 or 15 years. The really old ones could go all the way back to the 70's! Before that, I don't really know what there was. According to my upbringing, just sad, lifeless "denominations". My mom's family went to the Christian Church or Church of Christ or Disciples of Christ or something like that. My Dad's family didn't go anywhere. Several of the churches that I personally have attended were birthed out of the "Jesus Movement" of the early 70's in Southern California. I could probably tell you pretty accurately the story of John Wimber's journey to Christ and his foundin of the Vineyard (now known as the Association of Vineyard Churches.) Going back further than that I could also tell you the story of Oral Roberts and how his healing ministry was started after he came to know Christ. But I can't connect those two and it seems like since they are part of the same family - not just Christianity, but even very similar expressions of it - I should be able to somehow.

Now, however, I have this seemingly endless line of ancestors who have done all these amazing and courageous things, and most importantly have passed it on, reasonably untainted, from one generation to the next. Now I take part in some of the very same events that those ancestors did in the very first century. I hear/sing some of the very same hymns as St. John Chrysostom did in 4th century Constantinople. I see their pictures every week and am reminded that I am a part of something so much bigger than me. I am able to read their writings so I know what they felt and thought. I can know how they lived and how they died. This "genealogy" so to speak, is not without it's dysfunction or corruption, but there doesn't seem to be any effort to hide that. No one seems to be particularly proud or fond of Arius, but we still talk about him because his beliefs played a part in shaping and defining us and what we believe. And not just Orthodoxy with a big O, but really all of orthodox Christianity. I think it's kind of sad that I didn't know things like this before.

On more than one occasion I have said something to my husband about wishing I could be part of a Greek or Italian family. One reason is because they are just so passionate about everything they do. The other is because they have such a rich history and they treasure it. I grew up believing that "traditional" pretty much equaled dull and uninteresting, but I have an entirely different perspective now. Tradition can indeed be lifeless habit if you allow it, but what I have experienced of it over the past year is truly a beautiful thing and I am grateful to have discovered it.