Is my son "saved"?

Born again.
The 4 spiritual laws.
The sinners prayer.
Asking Jesus into your heart.

These are phrases that have been a part of my life for about as long as I can remember. Lately, they are starting to sound more and more like a foreign language. What in the world do those things really mean, and where did they originate? How old or young are these concepts? Do they have any rightful place in my faith? Admittedly, I am spouting before searching, but I can certainly still ask, right?

Let me relay a little story. Back in our early "courtin'" days, Erik accompanied me to my college roommates wedding. Her whole family is very dear to me and I respect them a great deal. It mattered to me what they thought of this new guy in my life. Within minutes - seriously, mere moments - of being introduced to "Pastor Paul" (did I mention that my roommates dad was a minister?) he asked Erik point blank when he came to know the Lord. You see in my world, there is a point of demarcation and if you really meant it, then you would know the precise moment that you became "born again". I had no idea how Erik would respond. I am sad to admit it today, but the truth is I was disappointed when he had no real "testimony" to offer, at least not by my definition. I doubted his salvation.

Now, here I am today with a 5 year old son. A son who is learning about God and Jesus and Faith (big F intended). A son who has quesions to ask his mother who daily questions what truth and Faith and this Christian life really are. Here is what I still believe right now. God does not have grandchildren. While our Faith can certainly be passed on, it certainly is not a part of our DNA. Each of us must make our own personal choice. However, I am no longer convinced that that choice needs to look or sound any particular way. Seriously, if one does not pray the sweeping "forgive me of my sins and come into my heart" prayer, (whatever 'come into my heart' means) are we not truly followers of Christ? Right now, Quincy believes that God is real. He also believes that God and Jesus are one and that Jesus is always with him and loves him no matter what. What if he never prays "the" prayer? Are all his beliefs for naught?

I get the impression in the Christian world - at least in the circles I have been in - that we parents carry this sort of burden, if you will, to ensure our children's salvation. That we can't really rest until our children have stated in no uncertain terms that they are on board. It's almost like we strive for that moment when we can wipe our brow, let out a big sigh and know that we are good parents and our children are going to heaven. And most of all, we need something to point to so we can say "see, that's when it happened". Is God really going to hold me accountable for my children's salvation or am I simply accountable to be honest with them and share with them what I have come to know as the truth, foggy as that may be at times? And is salvation a moment in time or something that occurs over a span of time? Or does it even have to be either/or? If I live my life following Christ the best I can, and Quincy follows along, is that enough?

My husband still does not have an event to point to, but I no longer doubt his salvation. I still don't know what to make of my son, though. I'm pretty sure I need to let it go because after all, it is personal. But I am finding that old habits and beliefs die hard. Once again, is it really my responsibility to make sure he chooses to follow Christ or do I just need to provide him with the tools to make his own choice? I remember the anxious thoughts I had when I was pregnant with Quincy. This often overwhelming sense of responsibility to raise up a decent human being and then add on top of that leading him to Christ. Yikes! My husband shared what I believe to be some very wise words with me at that time. He said that without a doubt, we will pack some emotional baggage for our children. No parent is perfect and we really should realize this at the beginning. But the best part of what he said was this. "All we really have to do is love him and show him Jesus." I know that is terribly simplistic, but I'm a pretty simple gal. I still am not sure of the answer to my question, but I am slowly learning to loosen my grip and trust God to lead not only me, but the rest of my family as well.